obsession

tirsdag 24. september 2013




most people enjoy tv-shows, games,
movies and music.
I don't. Or that is, I often do.
Sometimes I just think "hey, this show
is fucking amazing! I want to watch
it all." But every now and then,
I obsess.

And I don't mean in a cute "biggest
fan in the world" kind of way, I mean
it as in all I talk about, think about and
do for the next month or so.
It doesn't really feel good, and I know
my friends see it coming long before I do.
Especially my best friend, I know I've put
him through many hours of obsessive
fan-girling over the years we've been friends.
I feel kind of sorry for my boyfriend for
living with me during these periods, at
least I felt like I should've warned him.

During my obsessions I doodle "fan art",
I watch everything I can possibly find every
single day, I don't want to watch or talk
about -anything- else during this period, and
it never seems enough. (Its never crosses the line to fanfictions and sexual fantasies, however, but that's it)


I, of course, know I'm not alone in being overly excited when they find something they like, but I kind of don't...understand my own obsessing at times. Like, I haven't figured out the trigger yet. I don't see it coming, there's no type of game, artist or show I obsess with more than others.. I think.
It usually takes 3-7 day for me to realise I'm stuck in a hole filled with horrible fandoms, desperately grasping at whatever cannon material I can.




Six feet under is one of my favorite tv-dramas of all time, yet- no obsessing. I loved it, loved the characters, but when the tv was off, so was the show. 24 however. Big time. All I thought about, talked about, did. Even though the show isn't half as good in my opinion. I loved both Pokemon and Digimon as a child, but I was certainly more -into- digimon in terms of the universe, characters ect. Even though I played pokemon games and cards the entire time. Or, more recently; I've played Borderlands II for almost 200 hours, and both portal games took me like 8 hours in total, still it's the latter that sticks with me, that I'm drawing, talking about and quoting. I'm currently watching and greatly enjoying Breaking Bad, but yet, I just downloaded the sixth season of Californication just to see the few minutes of fucking Tim Minchin in every episode.

My theory is though that I have a certain love for things that are "clever and quirky". At least most of the times, and it usually takes a certain character for me to really fall in love with something, when talking about tv-shows and movies. In games, it's mostly an idea or thought, like the concept or plot-twist that elevate the game from being "a cool game" to something that sticks with me and just won't let go for the hell of it.
Maybe it's characters I can relate to in some way? I know my obsession with Digimon over Pokemon had to do with the characters acting like teens, I felt they were cooler that the other one's. I wanted to be like Tai, and their problems seemed more like mine. But then, what about 24? I honestly can't say. It was just so cool to me at the time. Twin peaks was mysterious, well-written and very interesting, but it was definately the quirks and charm of Dale Cooper that made me fall in love. Now, I can't identify with this character in any way. And it's never just a "handsome" thing. I guess he was just so weird and facinating it made the entire show creep even more under my skin. As for x-files, it was the chemistry between the two leads, plus Scully really fascinated me being a very complex character. Hm, there's something that could be said for quite a few characters; complex. I always enjouy the more complex, clever characters. The mix between light-hearted and complex is maybe what gets me, the darker, deeper characters that also turns out to be extremely human. Which is probably also why Portal stuck with me more than Borderlands; The character of Glad0s is very complex and just brilliant, and the entire concept is perfect.
What goes for Minchin, it went from "this guy is pretty cynical and clever" til I heard his more serious stuff and watched some interviews, and it turned into "jesus this guy is amazing". So again, a mix of funny, complex, clever and a nice smile.


I don't know how to end this, I wasn't really going anywhere with this anyways, I just wanted to ramble and appologise to all of my friends being bombarded with whatever "new" it is this month in my desperate attempt to enable more fans to have someone to talk to about all this.
Simon Pegg said "Being a geek is all about  being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection", so there's that.
But yeah, I guess every time something I like is a bit darker, quirkier, more complex yet light-hearted, preferably portraited by some very charming lead-character, I become a screaming fan-girl. So much that I just asked my boyfriend for a life-size cut-out of Tim Minchin for christmas.


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